August 10, 2003

From: "Mitchell"
To: "Abbey"
Subject: a good sport
Date: Sunday, August 10, 2003 12:08 PM

i tried my best.  i really did.  i went to the bar.  i consumed alcohol.  i
chatted, talked, joked, laughed.  i even went and danced.  i was a good
sport.  i really was.  then things began to unravel.  while i was busy
trying to have fun, someone must have poisoned the air because everyone went
mad.  it started inside the bar, but then quickly spread outside when the
bar closed (imagine:  even worse than sars).  soon i found myszelf amid
three groups of people, all fighting with each other, all crying together,
some too drunk for their own good (like an irish wedding or something).
blah, blah, blah, events progress, mar smokes me with her purse, then tries
to hug me, michelle goes bonkers and sets off a chain reaction of crying, david
keeps talking about "the casino", rory can't possibly be enjoying himself,
sokjir is acting like herself..... it was awful.  the drama seemingly ends
as i'm driving david and meg home, but the ashes respark the fire and the gong
show continues.  i finally get home and my beauty sleep is put on hold by a
late night phone call that wouldn't end.  finally i slept and everything was
good.  now i sit at my computer and try to make sense of what transpired.  i
only have one conclusion:  i was a good sport.

i like songs that make my heart ache.  they need to have borderline cheesy
lyrics and weenie vocals.

i hope you have/had a fine day at the beach today.  no mitchell to upset the
balance in your mind.  hooray.

today i will mow the lawn and clean the house.  then maybe i'll sing a song,
draw a picture, and look at old photographs.

sorry if i pissed you off yesterday.

the defeated,
mdk
~if you desire peace of soul and happiness, then believe; if you would be a
disciple of truth, then inquire.~

--------------------------------------------------------------

From: "Mitchell"
To: "Abbey"
Subject: two postscripts
Date: Sunday, August 10, 2003 12:14 PM

1)  Arundhati Roy

2)  Pelham Grenville Wodehouse

~if you desire peace of soul and happiness, then believe; if you would be a
disciple of truth, then inquire.~

--------------------------------------------------------------

From: "Mitchell"
To: "Abbey"
Subject: Re:
Date: Sunday, August 10, 2003 11:16 PM

"'angel':  Oh, Abbey, I knew you could do it.  Why can't you always be
encouraging and positive.  Abbey: As of September something, whenever school
starts, I will, but right now, I just can't."

is this because i will die on september 1st?  ho hum.  this makes me sad
(i.e. my death).  i can just imagine my mother crying.  naturally, i will
have a funeral held at the fort garry united church (my mother will convince
herself that i had accepted jesus into my heart, thus the church will make
sense)and hopefully the priest will say a few words that will convince god
that i wasn't really that bad and that i deserve to go to heaven.  i hope
the service will be short, too, because it will be hot in the church and
this will only speed up my body's decomposition.  maybe they'll play a few
songs that i like that will bring tears to the eyes of the mourners.  "in my
life" would be very suiting.  you will attend the service, wearing a cute
little black dress, but you will pass without attention being drawn to
yourself.  sitting at the back of the church, you will regret wishing death
upon me, but you'll reinforce the fact to yourself that, in spite of
everything, your hands are clean.  you'll even look at them to make doubly
sure.  sigh.

i'm not so good today.  not sure why.  maybe just tired.  i spent the
afternoon cleaning and mowing the lawn, as predicted.  i also included doing
laundry.  i was expecting my parents at about 6:30 and had prepared dinner
for this time, but they didn't arrive until 8:00.  the vegetables were soft
and the pesto had to be refrigerated.  fubar.  then, i was supposed to go to
folklarama with rory, but i called his house at 8:30 and his father said
that he'd already gone.  hmmmm.  i am a sad creature.

sorry, no insights today.  only more boring cynicism.  why do you put up
with me (spare me and don't answer please)?  i must sleep now.  thanks for
the nice long email.  i appreciate the time that you devote to my interests.
  i like you.  you're good.

hoping for a good dream tonight so i have something remotely interesting to
tell you,

claire

p.s. you should listen to the little person (i.e. devil... not midget) on
your elbow.  it sounds more intersting than the angel.
~if you desire peace of soul and happiness, then believe; if you would be a
disciple of truth, then inquire.~